He was born broken; one of a kind, A scarecrow one can find Here and there with splintered limbs Taught to always be half blind He was afraid even being undead As if everything he never said Can be heard through the silence Warring inside his uneven head
His name he remembered still Amen; meaning to fulfil But there were ashes in his waistcoat Of people he hurt but forgot to heal So he ran and walked and also crawled Eyes wide for one who had solved How a caterpillar in the end In a butterfly gets evolved
Days he spent in the random heat With shivering hands and on hobbling feet And at night he sought strangers known Who could tell where few roads meet And on bed made of carpet and cold He laid his flesh when it could no more hold The dreams of being young again When the promises were getting old
And in the morning, midst the fallen dew He thought of his life when it all was new Now what he has was being taken away When he already had so few But as the sun climbs its ladder high He marches once more to relive the lie Believing same as Icarius Wearing feathers would make him fly
And even today you can catch his glimpse The old man, who begs and limps, Through the mirror of mortal minds He is the maker of all the hymns One who tosses the coin for sun and rain The progeny of unrequited pain Hear his heartbeat as your own And in your vein his name: Amen.
I painted a white line Upon a blank canvas And the people they praised me no more They could not see; That the painting was an echo Of my silence that wasn’t seen before
The broken flowers they fell at my feet Gold and silver, ebony and peat And I knew not where this road may lead Will I find in the end what I need And I need... A silence in the shape of the sun A bit of violence with the face of a nun And someone who won't turn and run When I face down the barrel of a gun But hear now... I don't have a penny to pay as your price I spend my nights cold and filled up on rice And I know my heart is my own greatest vice Always afraid that my love won't suffice You can see... Out there those houses of princes and kings Whilst I can only shelter you neath my own wings And I have no diamonds to tie our rings Just the hollow of my chest to rest your sufferings So beware... Of my sweet words that may seduce and sway They only ache so to take you away And keep you happy come what it may We will be children till our hair turn grey But I know... This poem seems just a practice in rhymes And does not cover the cost of past crimes But I shall spend every penny and all of my dimes For our today and the end of our times So... Never forgive if you want but don't forget The magic of those moments we met And I wonder if it's my heart you now so hate But wasn't our love written by the hands of the fate? Thus I say… The broken flowers they fell at my feet Gold and silver, ebony and peat And I knew not where this road may lead Will I find in the end what I need And I need… You
A poet knows The name of all places And directions to none - Not a Poet
I write because it hurts And if I scream they will know my pain I don’t want to scream Don’t want to shatter the serene mirror That holds together All false reflections The world holds dear For the blame of it Would lie on me And I have enough confessions to pardon In my soliloquy
I slept late yesterday There was a tempest inside me And my mind was anchored loose I was swayed, buffeted And at once painted still As if my soul Was the albatross From the Rime of the Ancient Mariner And I thought: Every murder is a suicide in a way Isn’t it? To surrender the right of your life to someone else Without a fight There are many types of murders Of trust, flesh and mind Common massacres Gruesome One of a kind… It’s getting dark
I should have had dinner But the lights were too bright And candles too dim The plate felt soft And the spoon too thin Or was it me Who felt brittle and blind With so many dreams to dream And so few days to do (Now that was a lie For I cherish my own incompetence Like a child does it’s once favourite but now broken toy)
I am afraid I have found The edge of my reason And the world beyond (And would you believe it?) Is a mirror… It seems me and this mirror We are obsessed with each other In finding faults In pointing out to one another Our own shrinking horizons Until one of us agrees The threshold of our limitations
I slept late yesterday (No, I already said that Pardon, it’s the mirror reflecting my memories God I am tired)
Why cry about things you can laugh at Said the quote on my bathroom mirror It wasn’t funny I thought And smiled to myself
The nights have been short Or perhaps it was I who has been stretched thin Between two impossibilities Of being here and being there An almost everywhere Every thought of mine now Feels like a bullet through the brain The very last; and in a way everlasting But new ones creep out Out of this philosophical yeast Growing in the dark keeps of my mind Nurtured with cold sweat And self taught paralysis
The toothpaste tastes funny Like old age These are those days of winter When sadness feels warm Like a hug or a cup of coffee Something to snuggle into and fall asleep Sadness; the elixir of a dying man Sadness, yes And melancholy (Pretty word) Made of me and the unholy: Thoughts, dreams, desires Snails creeping on a wet wire
I remember a time When I dreamt of being a dog And lie on the carpet Of fallen leaves Dogs can dream, can’t they? (Yes) And so I dreamt of being a dog To come full circle A perfection My being complete A zero
The wind from the window Touches my face And I blush; Love is in the air Or is it despair? How can one compare? When being utterly unaware… (I rhymed on purpose For they say poetry must taste like a painting) I gargle and gag There is blood in my spit A rose line Branching out like a symphony Clarinet and timpani Violins and bassoons Bach and Beethoven Mozart who died too soon The tap turns A thunder The tap turns All silence
My finger on the window Made a rainbow in the dust And I could see my watered down mirage Gasping in surprise Laughter; a dry mist From the flesh of my throat As if my heart knew the humour Was the one that I wrote (I wonder if the people sitting at the table Can hear, discern, decode, confirm)
I should have worn socks It’s cold; The floor, the walls, the ceiling The curtains, the furniture, the feeling Should I wear it now? My toes are already numb And the ankles ache Yes, a mistake To wear it now Better to regret not wearing it at all Than knowing the comfort I lost It won’t solve Anything As such
It is December I do not remember the last December Or the one before All the memories of past winters Are glued together Indecipherable I was alone then In more ways than one Incomplete, high strung To come easily undone But not anymore…
She came from far The horizon was her home I knew her reflection Was same as my own Yet the ocean between us This sapphire separation Was daunting, nigh haunting With adrift ships and lost anchors And mad sailor men upon the shore And lighthouses blinking “Advance No More”
We sell paper boats now Made of torn poetry And write poems upon onion peels And ripe tomatoes It’s beautiful The fragrance of homemade chicken And her smile And that nodding head And the dancing waist She is happy So am I This December So am I…
And the world It is falling And there are no secrets Left to share I am found Someone’s calling And all I need is To be there So it’s a goodbye Everyone And I shall see you When the summer’s sun Is finally won
I rest my faults on my tongue And though it is textured as glass The taste is of raspberry Or blood I fail to distinguish My throat hurts From the cuts The bed is warm Like unwavering ash Like a tired pyre And I search with numb fingers My eyes; closed now For this is a dream I am not dead For this is a dream There is no bed The room I wake up to is all ochre And I am naked waist up Breath fills my belly And I shiver as the cold air claims my hunger My lungs, this ribcage holding together Heartbeats tearing to escape Stands out Like fingers from my skin I am a man no more Just random thoughts on a paper And my infinitesimal existence Like rings of rising vapour I remember being beautiful I remember being a being I remember writing those lyrics Which no man could ever sing But it is cold now And I feel I am too old to be young Now it is cold And I know I am too young to be old The winter is at the window And it is not going to wait The fire is long gone Now I am just a butterfly under the blanket And I would have closed my eyes Had the pillow not snored back Whispering to me All the things that I lack Privy to my dreams It does so on my behalf So when my dream does shatters I am not alone when I laugh
I do not desire To lie naked in a rattrap life And lubricate my verse with victorian words; Filled with awe inspiring acts Led by mundane lust Of Angels and Men alike Nor do deep desires murder me Nerve by nerve Peeling away my eggshell skin To illuminate the onion within; A coiled rainbow, boiled white Neither am I a shadow Fallen far from crowded feet Awaiting on indifferent paths For a heavenly retreat If at all I were to bare myself and be One thing that should suffice how I see Myself, in this crystal world Of self reflection and askewed insight I would be a thoughtful statue Sitting alone in a far off land With infinity in my head And nothing in my hand